Do vagina's smell?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
