scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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