RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
