I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Randomize