I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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