Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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