his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
