whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
My penis needs a shock collar
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
