Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
