If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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