So drunk its hurt
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
her facebook's as public as her vagina
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
