I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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