He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Randomize
