I can tuck mytits in my pants
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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