i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
