how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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