what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
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