oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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