Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
