did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
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