Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
