Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
