Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Randomize
