Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize