im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
