Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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