Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
