She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
