So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Randomize
