that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Randomize
