Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
