let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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