True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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