is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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