Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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