So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
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its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
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Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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