nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
