her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize