YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
