saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
