why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
