Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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