What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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