this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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