i permit you to call me
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize