just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
What a dumb baby whore.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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