It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
