I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
