I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
