i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
do herpes really smell.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
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