in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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